People are going mad in shops for the must have toys, presents are being wrapped aggressively with your new arch-enemy the sellotape, the Christmas card list is a daunting task and you’re so sick of mince pies that you swear if one more is shoved under your nose you will be throwing up into the New Year. Merry Christmas! It’s that time again, the season of festive fun and joy! So why do I feel unbelievably sarcastic and much like a Scrooge? Bah Humbug!
Well, it may have to do with a certain bit of extra weight I am carrying around. My bump. Pregnancy. The only thing I have been thinking about since I found out I was expecting. Pregnancy this, pregnancy that. After months and months of nothing but it, it starts to drive you a tad crazy. I am now 35 weeks pregnant and all I can think about is my unborn baby (CABBIT). Which, quite rightly is how it should be!
I am struggling to find the Christmas spirit and keep forgetting that we are in December until I see an outrageous outdoor light display, complete with fluorescent Santa and sleigh balancing on the roof. A mere gust of wind will make sure he doesn’t deliver presents before the 25th. I have eaten more than enough mince pies (I like pie and am greedy) and also have a chocolate advent calendar (again greedy) but I just can’t seem to remember that it’s Christmas time. Is it wrong to not be in the spirit when every sheer shudder of pain reminds me I could go into early labour? We don’t even have a tree this year. Last year we got a small, plastic one from 99p, not the best but it did the job. Had I had an old fairy liquid bottle lying around I would have made a fairy out of that and stuck her on top to spread the festive cheer. Although the other day we decorated Rob’s grandparent’s tree where I felt a sliver of Christmas joy jingle in my veins. Alas it did not last long as I was back to watching One Born Every Minute and biting my nails at the screams of pain as the women go into labour. Wonder if it is a good idea for me to watch? I don’t want to freak myself out but then again I don’t want to be unprepared. I have read so much about birth and labour but none of it sticks. I have no idea how I am going to be when I go into labour so how can I plan ahead? At least we are meeting the midwife this week to talk about our birthing plan so we have some vague idea of what I would like. I would like to give birth and get baby out!
What was I saying again? I keep forgetting trails of thought and being a bit of a clutz, another joy of pregnancy. Doing something one minute and then completely forgetting why you are doing it the next. I nearly poured coke into a bowl earlier. A bowl! I am losing my mind.
Christmas, that was it. Yes. I am going to try to get into the festive spirit, put on a silly hat, maybe do a pregnant dance to cheesy Christmas songs but I refuse to force it. If I’m not feeling it, then I can’t help it. Pregnancy has just taken up too much of my brain space to think about much else. I’m pretty sure that on the day I will feel all Christmassy, we are going to Rob’s grandparents where most of his family will all be having Christmas lunch. But the whole big lead up to the day just isn’t working for me like it used to each year. Maybe it’s a good thing? People do tend to go a bit mad over this time of year. And it’s all for ONE day! It shouldn’t be about the presents or the food (although the food is always good) but about family and loved ones and being together. And maybe being forced to wear silly hats and listen to bad jokes while wondering who in the world plays with such small cards or needs a tiny screwdriver the size of your pinky.
Let’s just hope I don’t go into labour during Christmas dinner, if I have not finished eating I will refuse to leave until I have had pudding!